Old lady speeding:
 

OLD LADY SPEEDING:


an older lady gets pulled over for speeding.......


OLDER WOMAN: is there a problem,officer

OFFICER: ma'am you were speeding

OLDER WOMAN:oh i see

OFFICER: can i see your license please

OLDER WOMAN: i'd give it to you but i dont have one

OFFICER: dont have one

OLDER WOMAN:lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving

OFFICER: i see... can i see your vehicle registration papers please?

OLDER WOMAN: i cant do that

OFFICER: why not?

OLDER WOMAN: i stole this car

OFFICER: stole it?

OLDER WOMAN: yes, and killed and hacked up the ower

OFFICER: you what?

OLDER WOMAN: his body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

the officer looks at the older woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back-up.
within 5 minutes police cars cars cicle around the car.a senior officer slowly approches the car,
clasping his half drawn gun

OFFICER 2: ma'am could you step out of your vehicle please

the woman step out of the car

OLDER WOMAN: is there a problem sir?

OFFICER 2: one of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner

OLDER WOMAN:murdered the owner?

OFFICER 2: yes could you please open the trunk of your car

the woman opens the trunk,revealing nothing but an empty trunk

OFFICER 2: is this your car ma'am?

OLDER WOMAN: yes, heres my registration papers

officer 2 is quite stunned

OFFICER 2: one of my officers claims that you do not have a drivers license

the woman digs in her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer

the officer examienes the license. he looks puzzled

OFFICER 2: thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didnt have a license,
that you stole this car,and that you murdered and hacked up the owner

OLDER WOMAN: i bet the lair told you i was speeding too.