recently,i was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D
recently,i was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D
age activated attention deficit disorder,this is how it manifests: i decide to water my garden. as i turn on the hose in the driveway, i look over at my car and decide my car needs washing. as i start toward the garage, i notice that there is mail on the porch table that i brought up from the mailbox earlier. i decide to go though the mail before i wash the car. i lay my car key down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,notice that the can if full. so, i decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first. but then i think, since im going to be near the mailbox, when i take out the garbage anyway, i may as well pay the bills first. i take my checkbook off the table, and see there's only one check left. my extra checks are in my desk in the study, so i go inside the house to my desk where i find the can of coke that i had been drinking. i'm going to look for my checks, but first i need to push the coke aside so i don't accidentally knock it over. i see the coke is getting warm, and decide i should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. as i head toward the kitchen with the coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need watered. i set the coke down on the counter, and i discover my reading glasses that i've been searching for all morning. i decide i better put them back on my desk, but first i'm gonna water the flowers. i set the glasses back down on the counter, fill the container with water and suddenly i spot the tv remote. someone left it on the kitchen table. i realize that tonight when we go to watch tv, i will be looking for the remote, but i wont remember that its on the kitchen table, so i decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first ill water the flowers. i pour some water in the glowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.so, i set the remote back down on the table, get some towels to wipe up the spill. then, i head down the hall trying to remember what i was planning to do, at the end of the day: ---the car isnt washed. ---the bills arent paid ---there is a warm can of coke sitting on the counter, ---the flowers dont have enough water, ---there is still only one check in the checkbook, ---i cant find the remote, ---i cant find my glasses, ---and i dont remember what i did with the car keys, then, when i try to figure out why nothing got done today, i'm really baffled because i know i was busy allday and im really tired. i realize this is a serious problem, and ill try to get some help for it, but first i'll check my email. do me a favor, will you? forward this message to everyone you know, because i dont remember to whom it has been sent. dont laugh -- if this isnt you yet, your day is coming! GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY,GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL,LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC. P.S. i just remembered I LEFT THE WATER RUNNING IN THE DRIVEWAY! |
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