Ways To Say Somebody Is Stupid
 

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Driveway doesn't quite reach the garage/street.

Any slower and he'd be in reverse.

Easier to count the bricks left than the bricks missing.

Even a two button mouse gives him too many options.

Got a life, but wasn't sure what to do with it.

Has been seen tossing bread crumbs to helicopters.

Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.

Her sewing machine's been out of thread for some time now.

Lives in the same world, but a different universe.

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load."

"Duh!" on parade.

24 cents short of a quarter.

A .22 caliber intellect in a .357 Magnum world.

A 1.0 in a 3.5 installation.

A 20th century man. The guy has no future.

A 3.5-inch drive, but data on punch cards.

A bad case of colon nose.

A barnacle on the ship of progress.

A black-and-white mind working on a color-coded problem.

A brain like a BB in a boxcar/box of Corn Flakes.

A butter knife in a steak/prime rib world.

A couple of blocks behind the parade.

A day late and a dollar short.

A deadbolt with a broken cylinder.

A dim bulb in the marquee of life.

A face designed for radio.

A face designed in a wind tunnel.

A few beers short of a six-pack.

A few bricks shy of a full load.

A few clowns short of a circus.

A few dice short of a full bag/role-player.

A few feathers short of a whole duck.

A few fries short of a Happy Meal.

A few peas short of a casserole.

A few photons short of a hologram/holodeck.

A few planets short of a federation

A flash of light, a cloud of dust, and. What was the question?

A great deal of pride, but very little to be proud of.

A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

A hemorrhoid on the face of the world.

A hop, skip, and jump from success, but to get there he'd have to give up
chewing gum.

A kangaroo loose in her top paddock.

A lap behind the field.

A legend in his own mind.

A logically defunct twit.

A looney tune.

A lot of feathers but not much chicken.

A medical mystery.

A mental midget with the IQ of a fencepost.

A mind like wet tennis shoes. Makes squishy noises when running.

A minefield of information.

A modest little person, with much to be modest about.

A natural talent for finding subliminal messages in ice cubes.

A Neanderthal brain in a Cro-Magnon body.

A notch off the timing mark.

A one-bit brain with a parity error.

A pacifist out of necessity/always loses in a battle of wits.

A PBS mind in an MTV world.

A peripheral visionary.

A person of rare intelligence. It's rare when he shows any.